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Pauper Dreams

by Bill Mallonee

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1.
TALK AROUND 02:56
Yeah, you old soul...I didn’t know you were back in town Oh, God, it’s been years since I saw you around and of course we’ll just talk around, talk around where it hurts the most yeah, we’ll just talk around, talk around leave that for the ghosts And all of that blood, that you spilled on the pages of your songs and life... Wasn’t that just...a writer’s... some kind of writer’s device? and of course we’ll just talk around, talk around where it hurts the most yeah, we’ll just talk around, talk around leave that for the ghosts
2.
I’ve decided that pride...is always at your sleeve I’ve decided the heart craves...mostly what it doesn’t need You know what I mean? what if I’m losing you but coming clean? honey I’m so afraid there may never be another , no never be another like you honey I’m so afraid there may never be another , no never be another like you I’ve decided we’re all scared...just like a kid who lost and most of what we call the truth...it’s all just plain false honey I’m so afraid there may never be another , no never be another like you honey I’m so afraid there may never be another , no never be another like you
3.
I hear they call it walking wounded oh, if words did just what they should nomenclature is a treasure that gets looted baby, ain’t we all just damaged goods? With souls as big as western sky like a field that is straining but lying fallow all the fruit’s dead before it arrives growing up into your own shadow If I could just hear you whisper my name disturb the universe’s dead air whispered like you really mean it before I vanish in thin air Awaiting something like catharsis you’ve already failed the whole damn thing here’s your ghost and there’s your pauper each...exchanging wedding rings Conjure up the memory of some laughter seems like it all once came down for free where’d the hour glass finally run out? the one that lies beneath your feet?
4.
Mother, I remember you all ringed with roses and laurel thanks for teaching me those words, but I couldn’t save you from your sorrow oh, please close your eyes...and wait to begin you’ll wake up...in your brand new skin Show me out some different way...to slide through that tomorrow if it vanishes like haze...your old life it’s just borrowed oh, to close your eyes...and wait to begin you’ll wake up...in your brand new skin now whatever falls away and whatever is dross whatever fills the grave ...and whatever gets lost If I hold it all up to the light and it’s all wrecked and scarred All that chrome and touch-up paint? Well, it won’t take you far oh, please close your eyes...and wait to begin you’ll wake up...in your brand new skin
5.
how you gonna make it to the door? how you gonna pay up on...more than you bargained for? How you gonna live down your past? how you gonna define your current ragged ass? yeah, this is gonna be one of those “baby-hold-on-tight-songs” This is gonna be one of those “baby-please-all-night-long-songs” chorus: What do you see...when you look in the mirror? God, you gotta make this a little clearer Did you know ‘bout the ruin; ‘fore the fall On the other side... On the other side On the other side of the wrecking ball? I’m sorry for the hurt...I’m sorry for the shame I’m sorry for the frame...you had to rearrange all bought and sold...yeah, the glitter and gold bought and sold yeah, this is gonna be one of those “baby-hold-on-tight-songs” This is gonna be one of those “baby-please-all-night-long-songs” chorus: what do you see when you look in the mirror? God, you gotta make this a little clearer did you know ‘bout the ruin; ‘fore it started to fall On the other side... On the other side on the other side of the wrecking ball? self-loathing...well, she’s a wicked mistress, son; spilling all the details through a bull-horn mercy, won’t you kiss a simple fool And I’ll buy you another round...and your new record, too yeah (Repeat chorus)
6.
(HOW MUCH LONGER) WILL YOU HANG AROUND? by Bill Mallonee outside a motel room dawn assembling throwing our gear in a cold van boredom of the days and the toll of empty rooms and stages how much first aid will this take bartender paths are winding backwards and the clocks are running down how much longer will you hang around was it all some cruel joke the punch line slow unfolding led here in wrong direction by putting your best foot forward lead you to this place a little numb from it all the pieces fall and fill up this hole in the wall a box of your regrets wristwatch and other personal effects photographs and notebooks with filled up pages two kids and a few friends long roads with many a dead end sweep it up and offer what's left to God
7.
CRAP P.A. 05:02
SHIT P.A. music/lyrics: bill mallonee brought it forth in the road noise drone wrote it down on dog-eared, yellowed pages girded up guitars for an audience of One and bled it through a shit PA sobered by the sound of 1K spikes nurtured on 2nd hand inhalation spoils of war...measured out in ounces at night no medals given for surviving degradations CHORUS: Once you ran...now ya’ stumble lookin’ for eternal light...at the end of the tunnel And I swear...if I make it outta here God, there’s no cover...it’s just one foot in front of the other and I swear...I won’t ask why if I make it out...out of here...alive... living by sharpened wits and razor-edge fear counterfeit thanks; the doorman hands to you the smaller part too big a lump to swallow...the killing of the years yielding nothing but these weeds inside your heart too many: “well, kid it didn’t work outs” too many benefits of the doubt too many phone calls never returned too many bridges you were forced to burn rent’s always cheap on hell’s half acre all the residents wave and say: “we’ll see ya’ later!” Ya’ sally forth to greet whatever’s left of the day and bleed it through a shit P.A. and bleed it through a shit P.A. and bleed it through a shit P.A. Mallonee: 12 string acoustic guitar, vocal Rose: vocals

about

~ PAUPER DREAMS ~ (formerly "Recent Demos")
Why is this album important?

It was recorded on 1 & 4 track machines. A "vibe" that is immediate and compelling, I think.

This was the FIRST set of pre-WPA demos I did after VoL's demise.
Very happy with the tracks. Mostly short songs, they capture the garage spontaneity i was striving for in my work at the time...
In some ways, "Talk Around" & "Never Be Another Like You" are as good as any garage recording could be. It's what i love,anyway, about garage-indie bands. Immediate, passionate...and possessing a certain magic.

"With Souls As Big As Western Skies," is one set of the most chilling set of lyrics I've ever written. Still love. They grapple with failure, real & imagined and wrestle with a God Who seems absent, distant.
"Brand New Skin" is a paean to my mother Mary Alice who had recently gone to be with the Lord. I built an other-world quality into it. Lose, imprecise in a very studied way, i think a lot of this was inspired by Big Star's 3rd album. (Big Star 3)

What you're hearing on this "Pauper Dreams" are the first stirrings of a new way of working, delivered in a new format that has become dear to me for it's immediacy and heart-on-sleeve qualities. i think these excursions have made me a better lyricist, a better guitarist and better writer...and it all started here.
Peace,
bill
-Footnote to the 2 Bonus Tracks-
These last two songs, "Shit P.A." & "How Much Longer Will You hang Around?," are analog 1 track DAT player recordings. "Live" in a cluttered room. Primitive. The first installment of a sound (pre-WPA) that began to surface on as a solo artist. You write, learn, take a breath and DO NOT overt think a one-track-one take recording.

Muriah & I recorded this shortly after we were married. We were living in a lil' house in Athens, Ga., a rental from some church friends. The house was situated near a large park, which we strolled in daily. I think we've found that Nature wields an intangible power over our spirits. When ever we feel depressed about eeking out a living as a writer, I am reminded that there are no guarantees. Poverty (& her sister, "Oblivion,") are friends I think I know on a first-name basis. I count it all joy on some days & skip thinking about it on others.

Sober denial can be a studied faith, all to itself.

Anyway these 2 songs showed up, were chased, written & recorded pretty fast. Muriah navigates really well on harmonies, considering we rehearsed them maybe twice before grabbing what i feel was a good take.
enjoy,
bill

credits

released August 18, 2013

Bill Mallonee: guitars, vocals, keyboards, drums, harmonica

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Bill Mallonee

Bill Mallonee is an Americana artist w/ 80 plus albums over a 30 year career. Voted by Paste Music Magazine #65 in their "Top 100 Living Songwriters" poll. He was the
founding member of Vigilantes of Love. He has worked with Mark Heard, Buddy Miller, Emmylou Harris, & Peter Buck from REM.
His most recent work, "Lead On, Kindly Light" is a 23song double Cd released Feb 2020.
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